Energy Drink Review: Max Velocity
Max Velocity is an energy drink produced by the Albertsons chain of grocery stores based out of Boise, Idaho. The fact that this is made by a company in Idaho is easily the most interesting thing about the drink. Seriously. Max Velocity is just unremarkable; it hits just enough notes to not offend, but honestly, I wish it tasted worse. Hear me out: it is better to either taste great or taste terrible because at least, one way or the other, you are left feeling something. If it tastes fantastic, well that is usually motivation enough to drink it again. Similarly, if it tastes poor, you’re more likely to repurchase it sometime in the future, to reconfirm your initial impressions. However, if you’re caught somewhere in the middle, where it neither offends nor pleases, then there is less motivation to ever buy it again, as reconfirming mediocrity is kind of pointless.
As is the case with Max Velocity, the drink is just downright forgettable.
The drink tastes like a watered down Red Bull, which isn’t necessarily terrible. However, if you’re going to go to the trouble of manufacturing and distributing a drink, wouldn’t you want to aim a little higher than the Royal Crown Cola of energy drinks? Everything about Max Velocity just seems so forced. Starting with the name and going all the way down to the packaging. Look at the cheetah’s face on the can. No, really look at it. Even the cheetah looks bored and disappointed.
Also disappointing are the ingredients: high fructose corn syrup is the sweetener of choice here. While this is par for the course with many energy drinks on the market today, the fact that they didn’t even bother to go the “healthy” route is just a missed opportunity. Even the drink it emulates the most, Red Bull, uses sucrose and glucose sugars. I would forgive the watered down taste if it were healthier than most energy drinks, but it isn’t, so I don’t.
Overall rating: Middle of the road. Forgettable, but not terrible by any means.
- Rob O’Reilly
