Energy Drink Review: Power Up! and Resident Evil T-Virus Antidote
Cross-post warning: This story also appears on our Gamefilter website. You can read more beverage reviews here.
If there are two worlds that have been set on a collision course, it is certainly the worlds of highly caffeinated energy drinks and videogaming. Remember those youthful nights spent trying to fight both Bowser and one’s own eyelids as they instinctively try to trick you into sleep? Of course you do! Up for review today are two energy drinks “inspired” by videogames and manufactured by Boston America Corp.
Power Up! “Product not intended for children”
First is Power Up!, a Super Mario inspired drink. Sort of fruity and not too carbonated, Power Up! tastes very watery. I’d even initially go so far to say that maybe this was some kind of manufacturing mistake, like how, possibly, not enough of the base syrup had made it into the can. However, for reasons explained later, this is an incredibly generous concession and one that is completely wrong. Really, the drink is just incredibly mediocre.
Also mediocre is the packaging job. Sporting a Mario 2-era Mario holding a mushroom against a blank blue background, they didn’t even try to make this drink appealing. They really could have done something special here, like use some 8-bit graphics or recreate the famous first level of Super Mario Bros. Hell, if they had even bothered to have Mario bashing open some bricks to unveil a starman, I’d have given them a pass. As if this affront to graphic design weren’t enough, the can is shoddily manufactured too! The label wrapped around the can is a little too long, so, as you drink, flimsy plastic rubs up against your lips.
I don’t know what I should have expected from a Mario inspired energy drink. Really, how do you translate the Mushroom Kingdom into a flavor? Should this have been somehow Italian flavored? This drink is licensed by Nintendo too! And, keeping faithful to their new licensing seal, the drink comes with an Official Nintendo Seal printed on the can. No, not the one of quality, just a quick affirmation that, yes, Little Jimmy, Nintendo made a few pennies of this quick attempt to co-opt your childhood.
Maybe I got my hopes up a little too much. This is made by a company called Boston America Corp., after all, a company so devoid of creativity it got its name from it’s location on Earth.
Overall rating: Mediocre. If you take into consideration my childhood love of Mario, this would get much, much worse. Unfortunately, I strive for objectivity, so I will review the drink strictly on its merits.
Resident Evil T-Virus Antidote “Based on a game rated Mature by the ESRB.”
Next up we have Resident Evil T-Virus Antidote, a drink which gets its namesake from the long running survival horror series Resident Evil. After how disappointing Power Up!’s packaging was, T-Virus is downright inspired. Though the idea of a jumping Tyrant monster holding the severed head of Jill Valentine would have been too fantastic of an idea for me to pass up, Boston America Corp. thankfully showed some restraint. Replete with Umbrella Corp. logos and having actually seen some time within a photo editing program of some kind, it is actually really surprising that this was made by the same company.
Unfortunately, as soon as you drink T-Virus, the type of people you are dealing with becomes readily apparent. Resident Evil T-Virus Antidote is the exact same drink as Power Up! Yes, the Resident Evil inspired energy drink tastes identical to the Super Mario inspired energy drink. Let me make this abundantly clear: Boston America Corp. produces one liquid and then packages it into two different cans, one based upon a series of games where you must shoot thousands, nay tens-of-thousands, of zombies and another based on a game where a portly Italian plumber grows a raccoon tail and jumps into giant green shoes.
This is downright pathetic. Both drinks are just shameless money-grabs. There really isn’t much more to say, read the Power Up! review to know what this tastes like. For the lazy: it tastes watery and is a waste of your goddamn time.
Overall rating: Mediocre. Yet again, I’m striving for objectivity. Individually, in a whiteroom environment, T-Virus is neither bad nor good.
Sure, maybe expecting a company to treat a valuable licenses such as Resident Evil and Super Mario with care and respect is a little much. I will give you that. But is it too much to ask for them to make at least two different drinks? This is worse than Mountain Dew Game Fuel, which, if I recall correctly, at least successfully approximated the taste of Master Chief’s sweaty crotch. At least that shit was authentic.
Further Reading:
Website: Boston America Corp.
- Rob O’Reilly
